Men and Dating - Series 1 Episode 11

Rejection or Pity Date -

Which is better? Rejecting a guy or just going on a pity date with him? (I’m aiming this towards girls but guys, just adjust this for yourself.) Once upon a time, I went on a pity date. It did not end all that well. It wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t good. The guy thought that since I went with him on that date, it meant I liked him. He wouldn’t leave me alone! So I finally had to tell him straight out that I wasn’t interested. He was rejected and he was a pity date. Not the best way to handle things for me.

It’s ok to reject someone. You don’t have to “let them down easy”. Just tell them you aren’t interested, without beating around the bush. Now, if they are beating around the bush in asking, I think it’s kind of awkward to call them out. So I don’t usually. Is that the best thing for me to do? I don’t know, but I do it anyways.

No one wants to be a pity date. That’s just terrible. So don’t do it. Not even if you think they’ll never find out. It doesn’t matter. It’s not kind to them. It is kind to tell them when you aren’t interested so they can move on before they get too attached to you. Don’t ever even accidentally lead someone on if you can prevent it.

So if you don’t like a guy, don’t go out with him. Simple as that. Don’t say “Oh, I’ll give him a chance.” That’s just asking for disaster. He’ll just want another chance and another. “See, we had fun tonight. Let’s go again.” he’ll say. It will be a never-ending cycle. So just don’t do it. You can afford to be picky.

And let’s face it. At least for me, I have so much more fun not going on those dates than I ever do when I actually go. It doesn’t matter if you haven’t been on a date for a long time. Just don’t go. This is YOUR eternity. Be picky about who you date.

ONLY DATE THOSE WHO YOU COULD SEE YOURSELF MARRYING. You have a list? So use it.

(Side note: It’s ok if you get rejected. It’s not the end of the world. It’s better to go through with that rejection now than later when you’re really attached, or not really attached as the case may be.)

~Rose